Anonymous Confessions

It was a arrange marriage. Last Year mid mai nikkah hua. Phir year end pr shadi hoi. Nikkah se le k shadi tk sab thik tha. na koi larai na koi behes na e koi gila shikwa. ham khush thy dono. aur phir shadi ka din agya. Jaise wo shadi krna chahti thi waisi maine shadi ki. jis chiz pr hath rkha wo dilai. Shadi huye ab 2 mahiny guzry thy to meri job chli gai. mai ghr bth gya. ab sir pr aik zimedari thi, ghr pr maine faltu bthna munasib na smjha aur mai indrive chlana shuru kr di. taky mai apni bivi ki zaroriyat pori kr sko. ab hmary ghr mai meri saas aur salio ki interference bhut zayada bhrny lag pari. k is shehr se kahin aur move kr jana chahye hamain ya bahir move kr jana chahye. bat to sai thi lekin mere pas savings nai thi to mai nai kr skta tha yh sab afford. jis pr mere smjhany k bawajood hmari larayian brhti gai aur ham aik dsry se dor hty ja rhy thy. aik din mai thaka hara ghr aya. meri bivi kitchen mai thi. ham dono k pas same phone thy same color same wallpaper a to z dito same. maine apna phone smjh k uska phone uthaya. fingerprint ham dono k phone mai aik dsry k lagy huye thy. phone unlock hua. to samny insta khula hua tha. mai dekhta ho whan uski kisi larky k sath disappearing chat chl rai thi. mai heran prshan. maine next day se kam pr na gya. 1 din wait kia 2 din wait kia. k yh khud btaye gi mjhy. mjhy to bharosa e us pr bhut tha k yh mjhy cheat nai kr skti. au wo mjhy ghr btha dekh k chir chari hti ja rai thi. khair aik din hmari larai ho gai is bat pr k ghr kio bthy ho. jao paise kama k lao. maine b ghusy mai us se us larky k bary mai poch lia k yh kon hai jis pr larai mazeed bigad gai aur ham dono mai bat hna bnd ho gai pori trh. 4 5 din mai dsry kamry mai sota rha. aik din subah wo mere pas ai aur bolti k mai pregnant ho. mai khush b tha prshan b tha. prshani bchy ki nai apny bivi k sath taluq ki thi. maine 1 2 din socha aur apni bivi k pas gya pyar se bat ki us se mafi mangi, aur apny dil ko smjhaya k ab aik aur zindagi shuru ho jani hai insano se ghltian ho jati hain maaf kr de. hafta guzra hmary darmian chizain thri bhtr hony lagi lekin tab usny aik kadam uthya jo k pregnanncy terminate krny ka tha. aur mjhy is chiz ka ilm na tha k usny yh kr dia. us kadam ki wjah se uski tabiyat kharab hony lagi, usny nai btya. akhir jab 10 din guzr gaye aur usky b hath se bat nikl gai to usny bola k mjhy doc k pas le k jao. gynacologist k pas le k gya usy mai. lekin gynacologist b usky sath mil gai aur mjh se bat chupai gai phir se. ab in sab k bad wo maikay gai. mai leny jata agy se kbhi uski maa batmizian kr deti, kbahi wo. aur wapis ghr any k lye shartain rkhi jati k yh kr wo kr. maine to shrtain b man li. apni gari bechi jo k kul rozi roti kamany ka zariya tha mere pas. aur uski shrtain pori kr di. ghr k kam krwaye uski zarorat ki chizain li. aur b bhut kuch. jab yh sab pora kr k mai usy leny gya to aik aur shrt rkh di k tmhary maa bap k sath nai rehna. mulk se bahir chlo aur mjhy b le k jao sath nai to talaq do. maine manany ki koshish ki nahi mani. khair akhir kar kya hua usny mjh se divorce le li. wo jit gai. mai har gya. ab wo mazy mai zindagi ji rhi aur mai? mai btha idr wo loans utar rha ho jo maine usky sakoon k lye uthaye thy

My husband is scared from his parents, i feel like my in laws are controlling my marriage. It’s been 3 yrs to our marriage and he still has no self opinion, no financial independence and after marriage even i have restrictions to almost everything(can’t hit the gym, can’t go anywhere alone, can’t even go to my parents house for more then once a month. Idk how to change this

I had a crush on my cousin when she was in 9th grade, I became friends with her in her matric, we got into long distance relationship in her intermediate. Then she got into Med school. I supported her in all of her exams, stay awake to calm her anxiety as she used to get panic attacks in exams. In first year of MBBS she started hanging out and going on trips with her male batch mates and fell in love with one of them in 2nd year. When he ditched her she came back to me, and I didn’t make her feel bad as it was a 2 months thing. In her 4th year she left me for good. I tried to talk but she started being disrespectful towards me. Its been 3 months without her, I feel like Ive lost a piece of myself. I think about ending my life. I don’t know if I can ever put my heart into anyone again.

Hi it's been almost 3 years since my marriage, I don't what's wrong but my wife is always in bad mood, she scolds, yells almost all the time even on minute things. She doesn't like my parents even though they never said a thing to her, she just don't like them and say they are backward so they went back to our village house. I thought if I prioritize her over my parents she will realize that how much sincere I am with her, but nothing changed in her behavior she always find some problem and make her mood, she have maid for cleaning cooking, washing but she yells that she has to manage the maids, I don't know what can should I do to make her please. I have sacrificed everything of my personal life for her but she always finds another problem. She says things like bhar me jao, bakwas, jaahil admi, Pagal causally on minute things to me. I am burning from inside. I never ever considered leaving her due to my 1.5 years old baby. Sometimes I think I am the problem but even though I do things she wants me to do she will be happy for a day or two then she will get back to her bad mood. What should I do? I would really appreciate suggestions from other married people. Thanks

Mai foreign countries visit karna chahta hun mairay person Kay hisab say Mai akaila hi ja sakta hun mujee shoq hai bht zyada shadi kay Meri biwi mujsay larrti hai Kay muje bhe Lai Kay jao Mai Pakistan mai to outing karwaya hun northern areas Mai foreign countries ka budget nahi ban pata Mai Kya karun khud. Bhe Jana chorr du maira akailay ka expense bhe Kam atta hai larkay kahin bhe adjust kar laitay hain larkiyan wesay adjust nahi kar payen gi

Sab se pehle Alhamdulillah. Allah bohat Raheem o Kareem hai. Allah ne mujhe meri soch se zyada diya hai, mujhe kisi ka mohtaj nahi banaya aur har mushkil ke baad mujhe aur zyada sambhala hai. Mere saare behan bhaiyon mein bhi Allah ne mujh par bohat rehmat farmayi hai and I will forever be grateful for every single blessing He has given me. Aaj jo kuch mere paas hai woh kisi insaan ki wajah se nahi, sirf Allah ke karam se hai. People can try to hurt you, take advantage of you or turn others against you, lekin jab Allah kisi par meherban ho toh koi uska rizq, izzat ya naseeb nahi cheen sakta. Unfortunately mere so called apno ne mere saath jo kiya woh bohat dukh dene wala tha. I live abroad and I used to send money to my mother and brother. Unke kharchon ke liye bhi aur apne paise bhi unke paas safe keeping ke liye rakhe because I trusted my own family. Mujhe laga apno se zyada safe aur kaun hoga. But when I went back and asked for my own money, I was treated like I had done something wrong. Mere saath aisa sulook hua jaise I was asking for someone else’s money instead of what rightfully belonged to me. Sab se zyada dukh is baat ka hua ke meri apni saghi maa ne paison ki wajah se mujhe poore khandan mein badnaam kiya ke maine unke paise kha liye, jab ke haqeeqat bilkul ulat thi. I used to send money from abroad, covered their expenses as well and kept my own money with them as an amanat. Behnoi ne crore ka qarza liya aur woh wapas nahi diya, lekin us par sab khamosh rahe. Aur jab maine apna hi paisa maanga, suddenly I was made out to be the bad person. Lekin Alhamdulillah Allah Raheem o Kareem hai. Allah ne mujhe itna diya hai ke mujhe kisi ke paison ki zarurat nahi. Baat kabhi paison ki mohtaji ki thi hi nahi. It was about trust, respect, honesty and what was rightfully mine. Shayad kuch logon ko laga ke main woh murghi hoon jise jab dil chahe kaat lo aur faida uthate raho. But generosity is not weakness. Kisi ko dena, uska kharcha uthana aur uski madad karna iska matlab yeh nahi ke usko aapko use karne ka haq mil gaya. Aur maa ke baare mein kya hi kahoon. Duniya se har cheez expect ki ja sakti hai, lekin insaan apni maa se yeh expect nahi karta. Dil se sirf itna sawal nikalta hai, kya maayein aisi bhi hoti hain? Phir bhi mere liye sab se bari baat yeh hai ke Allah sab dekh raha hai. Allah niyyat bhi jaanta hai, haqeeqat bhi jaanta hai aur kis ne kis ke saath kya kiya woh bhi jaanta hai. I don’t need to prove myself to everyone. Allah knows the truth and for me that is enough. Paisa dobara aa jata hai. Alhamdulillah Allah ne mujhe aur bhi diya hai. Lekin jab apne hi bharosa, izzat aur rishton ko paison ke liye tod dein toh woh cheez insaan kabhi nahi bhoolta. Allah bohat Raheem o Kareem hai. Jo log aapka haq kha lein, Allah us se kahin zyada dene ki qudrat rakhta hai. Jo log aapko neecha dikhane ki koshish karein, Allah aapko unki soch se bhi zyada upar utha sakta hai. I leave everything to Allah. Allah har ek ko uski niyyat aur amal ke mutabiq de aur humein kabhi kisi ka haq maarne wala na banaye. Alhamdulillah for everything. Allah is enough for me.

Where is the younger generation headed?

I was waiting for a signal, and two boys on a bike were talking to each other. They were talking about a girl. One said: "Wo zaat ky bahir shadi nai kerty." The other said, "Oh, acha". The first one again said, "Main b kahun ga deni hai to de nai deni to nikall", then they laughed, and I was shocked to hear their conversation. Like what they have learned in their life. What if it was their sister? Marrying within caste is their choice, but what he thinks about her hurts me. May ALLAH take us all to the right path.

My husband is a hard core gamer.

32F, married for 6 years and have 2 kids, a son and a daigher. My husband is a hardcore gamer, like a serious gamer. He is, by profession, a Software Engineer working remotely, but he never comes out of his room at all. When he ends his work, he starts playing games. He has a very eye-catching setup for gaming. He is very nice, caring, and fulfills all my needs. I have only one issue with him. He never comes out of his room. He does not spend time with kids at all. He never gives me time. If I want to talk to him, he just takes off one side of his headphones, listens to me, and keeps playing the game. I tried to talk to him about going out for a picnic, hiking, or going together to a gym, but he refuses. He prays 5 times a day but only in his room. I asked him if he had time to pray in the mosque, but he says, "time ka nai pata chalta; jamat ka time nikl jata hai." He only prays Jummah prayer in the mosque. I have no issue with his routine or anything, but in the long term, this is not good at all. I prepare food for him. I provide him with everything in his room. He asks for anything, and I prepare it for him, and I love to cook for him. On his last birthday, I gifted him a gaming keyboard because I know his priorities. I have set up a small gym at home and asked him to exercise whenever he has time he has never done any exercise. I am worried about him. I tried everything, and now I have nothing to try. I want him to spend time with his kids at least. I am sharing all this here to ask what I should do.

I am 30m Meri daid sal phly arrange marriage hui h mein ny is relation k lye efforts ki bht k hum mein achi bonding bany r cheezein smooth rhy lkn mujy na to physical attachment hui r na emotional q k meri wife jobian hai r uski job sy mujy koi issue ni lkn wo kafi dfferent nature ki h taunts marna kai kai din bt na krna travel py sth ly k jana to udr b chup kr bethy rhna Hum meij gap agya r mra is gap mein kisi or sy interaction hogya and i realize she is the one jesa mujy partner chaye I am too confused what to do.: Plx positve suggestion dijye ga

I am a school teacher and married with no children. Life's good till now. My husband is a farmer and my inlaws are pure desi people. Now after 10 long years they have changed a bit but they won't be able to understand my situation. Actually my husband's brother in law tried on me almost five years ago. He put forward his hand infront of me to shake when no one was around. I was shocked I said nothing and left the room asp. I did'nt tell anyone and behaved normally with him. I thought he would understand that i don't want anything like that but after five years he again tried. This time when i was alone in courtyard of my house he suddenly came and when he saw i was alone he asked me to go on the roof with him. I didn't understand first he repeated four times but I did not understand. He went away then i realized what he was asking. I now ignore him completely. But i cannot tell this to my husband or inlaws. My husband will fight with him and it will be a huge issue in family. Everyone especially my MIL will blame me. So i kept this to me. I hope in future i will gather courage to slap him if he even tries to do so.

I want to marry my friend's sister.

I have been with my friend for more than 10 years. I know him and his family. He knows me and knows my family. I saw her sister a few days ago, maybe she is studying at a university. I don't know, and I never asked him, but I think I like her. I cannot take her out of my head. My parents want me to get married, and they ask for my choice. I don't know whether I should tell them about her or not, but if I tell them, they would definitely agree, but this will change the relation of our friendship. I will be his brother-in-law, so maybe the funny part of our life will be gone. Secondly, how I will see in his eyes when he finds out I like his sister? I have planned something, I will ask my parents to go to her parents and ask for my rishta. If my friend says anything to me, I will say I don't know why my parents did this. I don't know if it will work or not. Do you have any suggestions?

My wife wakes up in the evening.

I work at a private company and have a 9-5 job. The issue is that when I get home at 6, my wife and son wake up, prepare food for us, and then they keep waking the whole night until morning at 7 AM or 8 AM. I hate this routine. I am not able to sleep at night, and in the office, I am half-asleep. I tried to change the routine of my family, but it looks like it can never be changed.

Should I offer her to be my second wife?

I am working in a multinational company in Islamabad and am married. I have 2 sons. The elder is 4 years old, and the younger is 1 year old. Before marriage, I was talking to a girl using a fake ID. I told her I was a boy, and somehow the conversation kept going. She was studying MBBS and was a very intelligent, mature, and modest girl. She was the girl I always dreamt of. Then she was nikkahfied, she barely used Facebook, and one day she was married, so she stopped using Facebook. I also stopped using that fake ID. Then I was also married, and Allah blessed me with 2 sons. One day I opened my fake ID, and I saw her online. I messaged her, and we started chatting again. She told me her husband died in an accident. She has 2 daughters now, and she is doing a specialization. We have been chatting for 4 months now. She never showed 0.1 percent interest in me. We have never met in person, never talked to each other on the phone, and never shared our photos with each other. I am planning to propose to her to be my second wife. I can take care of her daughters. I can have 2 homes. I can manage both wives. My first wife will have no issue with this. What should I do?

Someone misused my card and I think it's my husband.

I was checking my bank statement for tax returns, and I found a payment that has been made with my card. It was a subscription to a po***graphic site. I was stunned to see it. I immediately disabled my credit card. Then I thought I should check this further. The date and time of the payment were at night, at 2 AM. It is not possible to use my card without an OTP. When I checked my phone, there was no OTP. I can remember that at that time I was at home and was sleeping. How can my card be used for such a thing? I think this is my husband because only he knows my phone's password, he can get my credit card easily from my purse. A few months back, during winter, my husband went to another room at night. When I asked, he said I want to smoke. One day I entered his room, he had taken the blanket and was looking at something on his laptop. He immediately closed everything, and when I asked, he said he was watching reels. Who on earth would watch reels on a laptop late at night? I don't know what to do. Should I contact the site's support to find out which email was used for the subscription, because I want to know who used it and my 6th sense directs me to my husband.

I think my husband is cheating.

27F from Lahore. Blessed with 3 kids: 6, 4, and 1 years old. I have been married for more than 6 years, and I have no access to my husband's phone. There are a lot of face recognitions and passwords to open the apps. I tried logging into his iCloud, but I am not able to. In the past few years, this was not the case. I could see everything on his phone, but now he has protected everything, and whenever I ask him to open his phone, he just denies it. His behaviour has changed for more than 6 months. I have no details of his finances, his contacts, what he is doing, where he is going, nothing at all. If he is cheating, I want to catch him red-handed. How can I do that?